993: Iron Jugulis

Here is, unfortunately, probably the most tragic of all the Paradox Pokemon. What we have here is a robotic Hydreigon, but. Where to begin. Its robotifications come in the form of a big, spherical body with panel feet dangling off the side, and really panelly and segmented versions of Hydreigon's usual non-functioning-looking wings. And hey, I kinda dig that its arms fly free-form off the main body, like little drone sidekicks.

But I hate to say Jugulis is a real big mess. I think this is when the forced segmentation feels at its worst, because it just highlights how nonsense Hydreigon's wings are normally, when they could've done something like incorporate them as helicopter blades. It's supposed to be Dark/Flying, after all! And the only thing conveying it's "flying" is the fact that it floats off the ground.

The upper heads that are all one big domed screen is a neat idea on paper, but I don't really care for the result. Especially when it's backdropped by those popped collars exploding in hot pink, making what are supposed to be light-up screens look de-saturated by comparison. None of Jugulis' elements have a pleasant flow or cohesion to them, they just feel like a grab-bag of assorted robot bits with no direction behind any of them.

And I think the biggest problem here is that there's so much missed potential here, just. Within this space. Because we're going to have to keep in mind: if Ultra Beasts are anything to go by, these Paradox Pokemon are gonna be a one-and-done deal before they move on to something else. So you kinda HAVE to make every single entry in this series count. So when you get an outright dud like this, it stings, because how often are we going to get this opportunity, at least officially?

We could've had so many Pokemon take up this slot. Like, one of the first things I thought up when traveling through Area Zero for the first time in Violet version was "What if there was a robot Dragapult?" A Pokemon that would big-time feel complimented by the fact that it got mechanized. But even if it just HAS to be Hydreigon, what happened here? Back in the Gen 5 days, one of the few pre-release Pokemon concepts they shared was the fact that Hydreigon was almost a tank-dragon. Why didn't they remake that idea for this?

Iron Jugulis just feels so haphazard and aimless. For all the gripes the fans and myself have with the future Paradoxes, I would at least say all of them are coherent. They know what to be and execute it acceptably, at the very least. They get bad raps for being "just a Pokemon but as a robot", but that isn't true! Treads has the wheel thing! Bundle shoots a giant fire hose! Moth is a satellite! Valiant is a cool sci-fi warrior! Even the Irons of Justice have a holo-weapon thing going on. Jugulis IS that accusation, though. It's just "What if Hydreigon was a robot."

And as if to add insult to injury, the Occulture dex entry puts the image of Hydreigon having the hanky panky with a robot into your brain.